There was a mechanic named Bob
Who praised Jesus like it was his job.
I found this bizarre,
But he fixed up my car
And made this Jew feel like a snob.
A girl and I started to speak
In an online dating boutique.
Though she played off me,
She didn’t like coffee.
Our “relationship” lasted a week.
In Ohio, I went out to eat
At an ocean-themed place up the street.
But just cause the sea’s viewed
Doesn’t mean there’s good sea food.
So next time I’ll order red meat.